This blog post is going to be a hot issue and may be sensitive for some of you. It talks about pedophilia and my stance on it, so if this is troublesome for you or you are uncomfortable with it, please don’t read any further than this.
Before I proceed, let me make one thing absolutely crystal clear: child molesters are horrible people and they need to be punished adequately for what they’ve done. To be honest with you, I wouldn’t lose a wink of sleep over seeing them undergo the death penalty (stone them to death for all I care!). But not all pedophiles are child molesters, and not all child molesters are pedophiles. It’s time we stop confusing these things with one another because it’s doing more harm than good.
Whatever the reason for it is – neurological or just ‘born this way’ – pedophiles can no more choose to not be attracted to children as anyone of us can’t choose not to be attracted to the sex(es) we like. To say otherwise is doing a disservice to all of us because it makes the problem inaccessible and more difficult to deal with for everyone. Many pedophiles have never touched children despite being painfully aware of their attraction to them. They make great efforts to refrain from engaging in adult behavior with kids, even going so far as to avoid locations at certain times to reduce the stress on themselves. This is commendable. It speaks of good character and being victim to feelings that are out of your control but knowing right from wrong. They may not be able to choose their attraction, but they are able to choose how to deal with it.
I can’t imagine what kind of hell it must be. I truly pity them for living in fear and uncertainty all their lives.
“Then why don’t they seek help?!”
Oh, they try. Trust me, I’ve read more than one heartbreaking story where someone desperately wants help to deal with it. Pedophilia can’t be cured any more than homosexuality can be cured, which makes it doubly so difficult. Want to know the real kicker though? Help only comes after they molested a child. That’s right. In many cases, their pleas for help go ignored and they are told to ‘come back when you touched a kid’. That’s how messed up society’s stance on pedophilia is! It makes me wonder how many ended up convicted sex offenders if only to get into the system and receive treatment. Treatment should be available before any incidents happen, but the harsh reality is that it’s very often not. We can’t fight child molestation if we don’t take preventive measures.
“Why take the chance? Lock them all up right away before they cease their opportunity!”
For something they haven’t even done yet? For something they likely won’t even do if you put a proper support system into place to begin with? That is equally as stupid as saying we ought to lock up all black people because they’re going to steal our shit. Or to put a nation wide ban on glitter because ‘the gays are now loose’. Prejudice is ugly and prejudice towards pedophiles is no different. They don’t want to hurt children in most cases. They’re very aware of how damaging their attraction is. They are so aware of it they’re scared of being around their own family because they won’t understand and there’s no help for them!
“Gay rights have only led to one thing – pedophile rights!”
Yeah, I had to do a double take on that one too. Apparently now that homosexual marriage is legal in the US, fanatics see it as an opportunity to get on the slippery slope and equate pedophilia with homosexuality. (And they’re serious about it.) Hear me out: gay marriage is NOT a precedent for legalizing non-consensual sexual relationships between man and child (or man and animal and if you’re part of that debate). Gay marriage is and always has been about equal rights for two consenting adults, nothing more and nothing less. To find this comparable to child molestation is absurd and you really don’t have to worry that pedophiles suddenly have the right to touch children without consequence! That will never happen. I wish you’d put this much effort into fighting child marriage in countries where this still happens instead of spouting this nonsense.
“How are not all child molesters pedophiles? They’re molesting children! That’s what pedophiles do!”
Rape is not always about sexual attraction. In many cases, rape stems from the desire for power, to control, and children make easier targets than adults for a lot of these bastards. In other cases it’s a result of mental trauma and disease and again, this isn’t necessarily paired with sexual attraction to children. There are mentally or physically handicapped adults and children alike who fall victim to sexual abuse, and this is mainly because they tend to be completely defenseless. Gender and age often don’t matter here. I’m not saying that pedophiles never abuse children due to giving in to their attraction, I’m absolutely certain it does happen, but I am saying that not all accounts of sexual abuse of children stem strictly from pedophiles. This difference is crucial to understand because too many innocent pedophiles have judgment passed onto them for things they haven’t done. They’re scared to reach out, and as long as they don’t reach out, there won’t ever be help available to them. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to be broken.
I have never and will never approve of their attraction. If I find someone touching an innocent child, I will bludgeon them to pieces with whatever is within my reach or use my bare fists if I must. Touching children is abhorrent. You stay away from them no matter how you feel. I do understand that their feelings are not their choice. I do commend them for making the right decision on matters where they have a choice. I believe it’s time we stop judging blindly the second we hear the world ‘pedophile’ and start looking at the person and their choices before we judge. I believe we must offer support before they make a bad choice. Prevention is the best way to handle this, but prejudice won’t let us prevent it.
This is my stance on pedophilia. I am not ashamed of it. I’m sorry if you’re upset about this, but they’re people too. They deserve a chance. Let’s give it to them.